Help a Family Keep Custody of their Transgender Child

Letter from a grandmother who is trying to help her daughter and grandson who is living out his childhood as the gender he believes himself to be. Read this story and help support a family doing what they all families should do support their children. 

I am the grandmother of a 7-year-old child who loves bugs, swimming, artichokes, Elvis and Superman. When my grandchild was born, the doctors told my daughter that she had a baby girl. But my grandchild has consistently maintained that, “The doctors got it wrong” and “I’m really a boy.” He even picked a new name for himself: Jake. For the past year his mother and our side of the family have supported him living as a boy and have watched him absolutely thrive. Unfortunately his father, who shares 50% custody with my daughter, has not been supportive at all. In fact, he’s now filed a lawsuit to take away all of my daughter’s parenting rights solely because she supports her child’s self-proclaimed gender.

My daughter’s lawyer is fighting to help her keep custody of Jake but it’s been a long, difficult battle for her. The legal bills are already far more than she can afford and each day they continue to mount. My daughter and  her attorney have spoken to many large national organizations and they all tell her they can’t get involved because it is a family law case. One organization offered to pay the expert witness fees. We have done as much as possible to help her financially so now I’m asking for your help. Without her attorney, not only will she lose custody of Jake but he’ll lose his entire support system. This includes his mother, our side of the family and his affirming counselor. 

But that’s not all. Right now, Jake goes to school and is treated just like any other first grade boy. His teachers and friends are 100% supportive, everyone calls him by his chosen name and I’ve never seen him happier. If my daughter loses this legal battle all of that will change. Once Jake’s father gets full parenting rights, he will force my grandson to go to school as a girl—or as Jake calls it, as “his false self.” Jake will have to wear girl clothes and be called by his old “girl” name. He will no longer be seen or treated like the little boy that he is. Jake’s true identity will be completely invalidated.

I’m certain that the emotional impact of all of this on Jake would be beyond devastating. I can’t bear to have that happen. Please help my daughter continue to give my grandson the happy, supportive environment he needs to thrive. Anything you give will help, no matter how small.

Thank you so much for your help. It means more to me than I can possibly express.

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