Myths and Misconceptions of The Bisexual Community

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The book Bi-Notes for Bisexual Revolution written by Shiri Eisner is a great book for any activist or person who wants part of the movement for full equality in all walks of life.   Unless you’re part of the community of the people under or identifying under the bisexual and transgender umbrella know whom Shiri Eisner.

“Shiri Eisner is a feminist bisexual and genderqueer activist, writer and researcher. She resides in Tel Aviv, Israel/Occupied Palestine, where she founded and currently heads the grassroots bisexual organization, Panorama – Bi and Pansexual Feminist Community. She is currently pursuing her MA in gender studies while keeping involved with various political movements, including Mizrahi, feminist, queer, disability, animal liberation and Palestine solidarity work. She hopes to incite the revolution very soon.” Amazon

Chapter One speaks too many of the discussions and thoughts of “What is Bisexuality” and many terms are given and explained. While reading this chapter a quote by lesbian activist Dorothy Allison caught my eye.

“ I want to have adventures and take enormous risks and be everything they say we are”  

When I came out too myself that “I am bisexual and transgender” that was a turning point, and it didn’t happen over night. I had been forced to come out as bisexual at one time in myself that resulted in much unfair treatment toward myself by others. It was not until once I was able to safely say out loud for myself about my sexual orientation and had come out ONLY as bisexual under my own power and my own time, that I am romantically and sexually attracted too people who personally identify either a man or a woman.

The time to figure out my own gender identity and gender expression was another moment. When I was able to tell myself that my feelings of masculinity shouldn’t be kept to myself and in that time and place in front of one person at the time that I could say out loud “I have always felt male and have always wanted to be male and it is my wish that I start the transition to become the person I have always wanted to be” but to be able to say both at the same time was a process as well.

I made the decision too those around as well as myself that, we need to have people discuss these topics because that is they way things change. Education and discussion is one of the way things change happens, while being visible is they way things change.

When people are able to say they know someone or they care about someone who does identify this way can help bring about change. While being able to answer the difficult and uncomfortable questions that have never be able to ask before in regards to these topics.

“You must be the change, you wish too see in the world.” Gandhi

Many things are said regardless of either fact or myth about both the bisexual and transgender communities all the time. It’s a persons own personal decision if they choice to be a part of the community and identify with the community knowing the positive and the negative about the community. I took the time to educate myself on these facts and myths and then after being educated took on part of educating others on what is fact and what is myth on the topics of bisexuality and identifying as transgender.

The common myths and misconceptions some of them are discussion at length in the chapter in regard to the bisexual community. I have my own feelings on some of these and want to discuss them in the simplest of terms, also with my own opinion too them.

  • Bisexuality Doesn’t Exist

It has taken lots of people a while to be come comfortable with the idea of homosexuality and heterosexuality. The notations that while you believe in nature or nurture that people can be attracted to the opposite or the same gender they identify with. The idea that people can base love and attraction on more than what happens between two consenting adults in the bedroom.

 

            “Bisexuality has a lot of revolutionary potential. Society recognizes this. It’s time for us to start as well.” [1]

  • Bisexuals are confused, indecisive or just going through a phrase

 

“Confusion, indecision, and phases indicate a state of instability, fluidity, and process. Confusion points to instability as well as doubt, marking bisexuality as a vantage point for questioning as well as marking a radical potential change. “[2] 

The thing about dating and being in a committed relationship with either heterosexual or same couples variable is that the gender identity of the people stays the same. Bisexuality is the curve ball in the persons understanding, that a person could during the course of their dating history in their life before settling down could date either men or women and then settle down in a committed relationship with either.It would be the result in settling down that they have gone through a phrase and are either “gay” or “straight” depending on the outcome of the settling down.

“Bisexuality can be thought of as a destabilizing agent of social change, promoting doubt in anything, starting with our own sexual identities, going   through the structure of sex, gender, and sexuality; heteropatriarchy, and racism; and ending with such oppressive structures as the state, law order, war, and capitalism.”[3]

  • Bisexuals are slutty, promiscuous, or inherently unfaithful

            “Bisexuality is here being hyper sexualized under the presumption that sex is bad that wanting too much of it is bad, that wanting any of it is bad, that wanting people of more than one gender is bad, and that wanting more that one person is bad. The concept of infidelity or unfaithfulness might help think about monogamy as one of society’s oppressive structures. Monogamy has been used historically and currently as a capitalist an patriarchal tool for controlling women, and for keeping all people in small, docile units where they are isolated    and unable to connect and organize (especially in minority-world cultures)”[4]

 

There are promiscuous and inherently unfaithful people regardless of sexual orientation all over the city, the state, the country and even the world lots of people have sex and have unfaithful relationships. The world wants to hold on to the idea that sex and sexuality are bad. That we need to continue to ignore that we need to educate people on safe sex protections and that there are services available and should some receive notice of STD’s of STI’s there are ways to combat it and protect your future partners. It’s not fair too the individuals of bisexual do not face unfair treatment for all of acts of the free will of people, just because they are attract too either men or women.

“Society based on rape culture the sexualization of bisexuality can open a window to a different kind of sexual culture, encouraging sexual independence, exploration, and enjoyment of our bodies, our sexualities our various genders and our sexual interactions “[5]

 

  • Bisexuals are carriers or vectors of HIV and other STI’s

            “metaphorically, AIDS is always imagined as “the queer disease” being both a “punishment” for being queer and the embodiment of the straight population’s fear of  disease having unprotected bisex…”[6]

 

In 2013 we know that AIDS is spread through sexual contact regardless anal, oral or vaginal sex with a person. It can also be spread through pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding as babies come in contact with mothers body fluids such as amniotic fluid and blood or even during breast milk during a feeding. People who take drugs that are injected into the body can transmit HIV through the sharing of needles.

“this image of bisexuality also destabilizes the border between sickness and health, calling society’s ableism in question and marked disabled and chronically ill bodies as yet another site of transgression and resistance..”[7]

 

Bisexual don’t deserve to be the line between sexual health and a disease that has taken the lives of millions. It is not the fault of the bisexual community for the HIV/AIDS epidemic but we do have the ability to be an encouraging all members of the community too take a active role in the sexual health of people of the world. We should encourage testing, education and prevention of all people.

 

  • Bisexuals are actually gay or actually straight

 

            “This permits us to critically reflect this phallocentrism back into society, exposing the underlying system of sexism and misogyny as we do so. It might also help us explore alternative ways of relating to the penis itself, as well as to   masculinity, subverting sexist connotations of the penis as an all-powerful, all   forceful, all-domineering, hyper sexualized, and hypermauslinized phallus.”[8]

 

It has always been mentioned that “bisexual women are actually straight, while bisexual men are actually gay” because the idea is that both genders are attracted to one sole object and focused idea they want a penis, as the “prize” in all of this.

  • Bisexuals can chose to be gay or straight 

            “In a movement where the dominant discourse relies on lack of choice as its political path to equal rights, this lack of choice (the “born this way” argument”   becomes a “tool” for attaining legitimacy and acceptance by society”[9]

Its not that at all we just like every other person straight our gay want to live our lives with someone else, possibly raise a family with an idea of children if they so wish, and at the end of that grow old together and retire. It’s about more than sex, its about more its about the idea of how people see their lives after the partying and after going wild as a young adult.


[1] Pg. 44- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

[2] Pg. 44- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

[3] Pg. 44- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

[4] Pg. 45- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

[5] Pg. 45- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

[6] Pg. 46- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

[7] Pg. 47- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

[8] Pg. 47- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

[9] Pg. 48- Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution

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